Wednesday, June 11, 2008

A Mother's Guilt

I think one of the worst things a mother faces is a sense of guilt about how she parents. I am constantly questioning everything I do.

Did I nurse them long enough, or too long?
Should I have started them on solids earlier, or later?
Did I hold them too much, or not enough?
Did I make them grow up too fast, or did I keep them babies for too long?
Should I have used a pacifier, or not?
Should I have let them sleep with me, or let them sleep in a crib?
Should I let them watch television or should I wait until they are 2?

There were a lot of things that I did with Samuel that I now would not do with Joseph. Was I wrong in doing them, or not doing them before? I have to come to terms with the fact that no, I was not wrong. I did the best I could with what I was given. Yes, I do a lot of things differently now, but it's only because this is a second child and not the first. I've got a whole other child's experiences under my belt and this time around has shown itself to be a completely different experience anyways.

What worked with Samuel, does not work with Joseph.
What works with Joseph would not have worked with Samuel.

I see and hear about other mother's doing this that or the other with their children and if I'm not doing them I wonder if I should. I wonder if what I'm doing is helping or hurting their future.

Bottom line, it has to stop.

What I am doing right, and what is the absolute most important thing I could ever do for my children or anyone else in this world is that I am teaching them about who Jesus Christ is and what He did for us. When the world ends, nothing else matters.

Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. Philippians 4:6
I want to challenge us as mother's to decide what matter's most to us, and pursue it. Leave behind the guilt of not doing it all, and cling to what is good.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8
I am in the stages of starting another blog This will be my first post over there once I get it going. I would love for you to come visit me over there as I being to look into what it means to be a woman, wife and a mother God's way.